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Ex-Spouse Issues

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Consider providing a simple accounting of how support money is spent on a monthly or quarterly basis if you are on the receiving end of payments.
Comments such as, “She has a new dress. I bet she used child support to pay for it,” are common. Custodial parents can deflect comments like these, and possibly improve relationships with the payor spouse, by describing how support payments were spent on the children rather than themselves. It does not have to be a detailed accounting but, rather, general categories such as food, clothing, and allowances.
Another option is for the non-custodial parent to pay for some expenses (summer camp, dance lessons, or allowance, for example) directly rather than passing the money through to their ex-spouse. Check, first, with the custodial parent and get their agreement to changes in support payment procedures in writing.
Do not deny visitation to the non-custodial parent if a support payment is late or does not arrive. Experts generally agree that, while custodial parents have every right to be angry, they are using their child as a tool to punish the other parent.
Research indicates that the less frequently a parent has contact with their children, the more likely they are to withhold support payments. Try to separate parenting issues from financial issues when discussing children with an ex-spouse.


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Life Events & Financial Decisions

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Ex-Spouse Issues

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